Update on Lidiya's visit and my mission trip

Well, things have been very interesting around here, to say the least!  We have learned a lot about Lidiya, about her life back in the Ukraine, about her likes, about her dislikes, etc, etc.

Some of her likes:

• Ice cream (yes, this is purposely at the top of the list)
• French fries (yes, this is purposely the 2nd on the list...it fought for 1st and lost but not by much!)
• Bananas (she would eat 2 or 3 a day, if I let her)
• Peaches
• Strawberries
• Watermelon (seeing a pattern here?)
• Swimming
• Reading
• Movies

Some of her dislikes:

• Black Olives
• Onions (but she does like red onions...I do not understand this)
• Peas (I learned this the hard way when I put extra peas in my chicken pot pie because I did not have any carrots!)
• Lima beans
• Vacuuming (she is a great helper!!  But she will not vacuum!  LOL)
• Being tickled
• Being aggravated (she can dish it out but she definitely can not take it!)
• Cartoons

Things she said she didn't like but ended up liking after trying:

• Bacon
• Tacos
• Sushi

She is very good about trying new things.  I wish I was but my palette is not very adventurous at all!!  I'm starting to think I might lose some weight while in the Ukraine.  But everyone says the food is fabulous...I sure hope so!

We are having some struggles with behavior issues with Lidiya.  Mostly just her wanting her way and not being flexible to listen and obey.  It is hard to try and explain something to someone when they are not behaving and can't speak English.  Also, she is bonding with us in regards to having a good time, laughing and joking, playing and goofing around but she is struggling with allowing us to show her affection.  When trying to give her hugs, she is very reserved.  She will put her head on Danny's shoulder when she is tired or bored but that is about the length of any type of affection.  She is a protector, though.  If she thinks you are in harms way, she quickly alerts you.  She also always wants to make sure we have everything.  She will ask if I have my purse, keys, etc.  These are all behaviors that I am certain are survival for her.  She is in definitely in survival mode and can hold her own!

About my mission trip:

I will be leaving Raleigh on Aug 31 at 3:30 pm and arriving in Kiev on Sept 1 at 2:20 pm.  Then, there is a 12 hour ride by vehicle or train to the town where we will be visiting the Orphanages.  Total flying time is 12 hours, total travel time is about 28 hours.  I'm thinking I might be exhausted.  LOL  But the Lord will give me the energy I need in order to do work for His Kingdom and His Children!

We will be leaving Kiev on Sept 14 and flying into Amsterdam.  We will be staying overnight in Amsterdam.  We won't even arrive until 7:25 pm but I will have to make sure we find some time to get out and see a little bit of Amsterdam!  Then, we leave Amsterdam on Sept 15 at 11:05 am and I will be arriving in Raleigh at 5:44 pm after a layover in Atlanta.  Total flying time is 16 hours.  Weird how there is 4 more hours of flying time coming home than going there.  But that's OK because it is broken down into 2 days, so that makes it a little easier.

Seeing my itinerary makes this trip seem all that much more real.  I keep saying to myself, "wow - I am really going".  I know to some of you reading, I am over reacting but I really have never done anything like this before.  OK - I was in the Army and I went to Korea but for some reason, that just seemed so insignificant in comparison.  I have no idea why.  

But I am very excited and can not wait to do the Lord's work and see what He has in store for me.  

Where will God lead me?

So, I have this precious 13 year old girl in my own for 3 more weeks.  Then, 3 weeks after that, I head to the Ukraine for 3 weeks.  I do not know where I will be sleeping, I do not know what I will be eating (I may lose some of the weight I put back on since losing almost 30 pounds a couple of years ago), I do not not know exactly what I will be doing, I do not know if we will be going into Lidiya's Orphanage, I really just do not know.  But God knows.  So, I will follow His lead and just go.  One thing I did find out (and this isn't even set in stone) is that we will be leaving on approx. Aug 22 and returning on approx. Sept 14.  I have had some interesting birthday's in my life but this will probably end up at the top of the list.

• I turned 18 in basic training (yes, for those that do not know - I was in the Army)
• I turned 19 on a field mission, in the Army, in Korea
• I turned 20 on a field mission, in the Army, at Ft. Bragg
• I turned 21 and had my first birthday as an adult with no interesting experiences. 
• I turned 22 just 2 weeks after I met Danny
• I turned 26 recovering from having Coby just 5 days earlier
• I will turn 36 years old in either Ukraine or Latvia, sharing my life with a bunch of orphans!!!

Coby's 10th birthday is Sept 2nd and I will be in Ukraine or Latvia for his birthday, as well.  I am pretty certain, his 10th birthday will be at the bottom of the list for him.  He is a mama's boy and it is going to be 

t-o-u-g-h for him while I am gone.  So, please be in prayer for my family while I am gone for a long 3 weeks.  

On another note, I am still in need of $525 in order to make the trip.  Since we are leaving the 3rd week of August, I need to get the money into New Horizon's For Children by the beginning of August.  That leaves me  only 3 short weeks to raise $525.  I am not good at this, I do not like asking for money but as I get down to the wire, I realize that if I do not ask, I do not go.  Will you please consider helping me?  If just 21 of you helped me by giving $25, I would have all the money I need.  If 10 and a half of you (LOL) helped me by giving $50, I would have all the money I need.  Every bit helps.  And if I get more than $525, we will use that money towards hosting Lidiya again for Christmas.

Soooo....this is what it is like to have a teenage girl?

Boy oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy!  Having a teenage girl sure does bring a new level of drama into our home.  I am reverting back to how I felt before she came...."I feel inadequate to handle this".  But I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength (Phil 4:13).  It sure it not easy but whoever said doing God's work was supposed to be easy?

Lidiya is really starting to come out of her shell.  Oh really quick, I should mention that her name in Russian is pronounced "Lee-da".  I keep calling her Li-di-ya and she keeps correcting me.  She does not like the English pronunciation of her name!  Ok, anyhow....when she is home with us, she is starting to knock some of the walls down that she had built up the first week.  With that comes attitude.  Yes, teenage attitude.  Teenage girl attitude.  Yikes!  But, I am thankful for the attitude because that means she is starting to get comfortable with us.

One example of this was when we decided we were going to take her for ice cream to Sunni Skies.  Here is how it all began.  A few days earlier, Coby was singing a Justin Bieber song "Baby, baby, baby".  OK, I didn't even know he knew any JB songs and I surely didn't even know that was a JB song!  But Lidiya did!  She said, "Ohhhh...Justin Bieber!"  So, we tried getting her to sing the song (I really wanted to hear her sing it since it is in English) but she did not want to have anything to do with singing!  Well, the night we were going to take her to Sunni Skies, she wanted ice cream and pulled it out of the freezer.  I told her, "OK, you sing, you can have ice cream".  She said, "nooooo".  And we kept going back and forth with that.  She got to the point of taking the ice cream and running around the house with it because she wanted it but I kept telling her she had to sing first.  I finally made her put it back in the freezer and we left in the car.  At this point, she is in the back seat pouting.  I'm thinking it is because we told her "no" on the ice cream but little did she know, we were going to get ice cream anyhow.  We pull up to Sunni Skies and she refuses to get out of the car.  Are you kidding me?!?!  This is an ice cream place and you can't help but know that by the big ice cream sign out front.  Well, I finally got her out of the car and inside and when I asked her what she wanted she said, "I do not want any".  What?!?!  After the big fuss about the Blue Bunny Vanilla Ice Cream at home?  You now decide you do not want any?  I don't think so!  So, I got her some anyhow and of course she ate it.  But what an ordeal.  Later she admitted that she was not happy that we tried to make her sing!  Sheesh.

Then, yesterday we had plans to spend the afternoon with a family that is hosting two Ukrainian girls that Lidiya traveled here with.  She did not know them prior to coming but since they speak the same language, I thought it would be awesome to get them together.  I asked her several times before going if she wanted to hang out with them and the answer every time was yes.  So, we start with going to Cold Stone (are you seeing a pattern here yet?) at 2:00.  When we leave there, we follow them back to their house.  As soon as we pull up Lidiya says, "noooooo".  And once again refuses to get out of the car.  Oh my word!  Here we go again.  After at least 15 minutes, we finally convince her to come inside where she sits down and refuses to talk to anyone.  She is sitting on the couch and pouting.  But at least she isn't in the car where it will get to 95+ degrees.  The four other girls (two hosted, two daughters) and Coby (what fun for him) are all hanging out playing air hockey, video games, watching Shrek in Russian, etc.  Then, after being there for about 2 1/2 hours, we get ready to pray a blessing over our food and fellowship and she refuses to come in.  This is where I put my foot down and told her she did not have a choice.  So, she came to pray with us but quickly sat back down on the couch and refused to eat.  After dinner, Shirley (the other mom) asked Lidiya if she wanted to go upstairs with the girls and play video games.  Lidiya said "no".  Shirley said, "just to watch?" and Lidiya said, "OK".  Yay!  Thank you to Shirley for that!  Then, after a while they came downstairs, went outside and had a silly string fight.  Ohhhh....Lidiya was all over that!!  She was finally laughing and having a great time.

When we got home, she had to eat something because, oh yeah, she didn't eat any dinner!!!  Then, she went upstairs and we were back to normal.  She was having a pillow fight with Danny and really nailing him with those pillows!  Climbing up on him and throwing pillows on him and then body slamming him.  It was funny!  Then, she goes in my closet and shuts the door.  I was wondering what in the world that was all about but then she comes out wearing Danny's clothes!!!  She goes around and models them to everyone and then goes back in the closet and shuts the door.  The next time she comes out she is wearing my pajama top, Coby's pants, my knee-high boots and Danny's hat!  This goes on several more times and each time she comes out just showing off, laughing her sides off and modeling the outfits!

So, the night ended well until I told her that tomorrow the plan was to go to another friend's house.  "Nooooooo" was the response!!  Oh how I hope we do not end up with her pouting on the couch and having an attitude when we go today!!  What I am starting to realize, after talking to several people about this, is that she might not want to "share" us.  She realizes her time here is short and she wants all of our attention and does not want to have to share it with other people.  It completely breaks my heart knowing that this might be going on in her mind.  She knows that she goes back in 3 weeks.  What can we do to make the next 3 weeks the best for her?  Just love on her.  That is my goal.  We have not done much with her so far in regards to "stuff".....shopping, beach trips, amusement parks, etc.  We have eaten a lot of ice cream went to Duke Gardens and visited a few friends.  The first couple of weeks, I just wanted her to know what it is like to be a part of our family and to feel loved.  These next few weeks, we plan to do more with her.  I have discounted tickets to Pelicans for Snowballs and Putt Putt, Monkey Joes, Roller Skating, Movies, a Lake Day with our Sunday School Class, etc.  Plus, we plan on taking her to either the beach or an amusement park.

What a blessing it has been to have her in our home.  She has really affected me and I can see her affecting Danny and Coby, as well.  They are both changing in small ways.  I just pray that as much of a blessing that she has been to us - that we can be an equal blessing to her, as well.

Here is a pic of Lidiya pouting on the couch...

A pic of her indulging in the silly string war against Coby!

A pic of Coby covered in silly string by 5 girls who were attacking him!

After the silly string war, the girls came in and we did flash cards to learn Russian while they learn English.  Here is a pic of Lidiya talking to Julia.

Yay...she is smiling!!!

...And she even posed for a picture!!!

The night ended in silliness!!!!

The BIGGEST News so far!!

I was going through Lidiya's backpack and taking out the clothes that she had in there so that I could wash them.  I am such a bad host mom because it has taken me all this time to go through her backpack.  We were told to go through it right away in case they have medication in it.  Oops!

Anyhow, I found this in her backpack:

Hmmmm....I wonder what this is?  So, I showed it to her and asked her.  She tried to do hand motions to explain but that just wasn't working.  So, I handed her my phone and she typed in "Христос воскрес"  And you know what that translates to?  Well....let me tell you!  It translates as "Christ is Risen"!  Of all the things that she could have thrown in her backpack before she came, she chose to throw that in!!!!  So, then I showed her in a Russian Dictionary a list of religions and asked her which one she was and she pointed to Christian!  Not Catholic.  Christian!!  Yeah!!!  Now, I just need to foster that and make sure she knows exactly what it means to be a Child of God!!!

I am so excited about this!  This by far was the most special happening thus far.  Although, her calling me "mom" was pretty cool, too!

Nerves are gone but love has creeped in...

This is going to be a long post but I hope it is well worth your time to read it.  I am going to start with today's happenings and go backwards from there because today's happenings were the most special thus far.

We went to Duke Gardens and it was beautiful.  We looked at some beautiful flowers, ponds, trees, etc.

 This is a special picture of Lidiya and I.  She has a hard time smiling for the camera.

I love this flower...not a bad shot for a picture from the camera on my phone, huh?

I think Coby and Lidiya could totally pull off being siblings!

Family photo on the bench at the entrance of the gardens.

Then, after Duke Gardens, we decided to get something to eat.  We decided that the best place to take Lidiya was a buffet, so that she could pick what she wanted.  It would be too time consuming to "Google Translate" the entire menu at a restaurant!  So, off to Golden Corral we went.  She enjoyed fried shrimp, french fries and pizza.  Then, she got cucumber and tomato salad, a deviled egg (that she didn't like!), a whole bunch of strawberries and some desserts.  Other than ice cream, she really isn't much into sweets!  But we have learned that she likes breaded foods!  She didn't even know what the fried shrimp was but because it was breaded, she got it.  French fries are her favorite food!

Now about the most special moment thus far!  While at Golden Corral, I got up to get something to eat and Danny asked Lidiya if she wanted to go swimming later.  She pointed to him and asked if he was going to go and he said "yes".  Then Danny pointed to Coby and then pointed to my seat and Lidiya said, "Mama?"  Awww!!!  Did you catch that?  She called me Mom!!  But hold on....it gets better!  Then, she pointed to Coby's Papa and he just laughed!  Then, when I left to get dessert, Lidiya was freezing!  Everyone was done eating, except me, so Danny asked her if she wanted to go outside.  She pointed to where I went and said, "No!  Mama!"  She wasn't going to leave me behind!!!!  When Danny told me what happened, I have to admit, tears welled up in my eyes!  Not only did she call me mom but she didn't want to go without me!!!

I am definitely getting attached to this sweet girl.  It absolutely breaks my heart to know that I am going to send her back to Ukraine, to an orphanage where she doesn't have a mom and dad to love her, to know that in just 3 short years she will be kicked out of the orphanage and put out on the streets with just a backpack!! It just isn't fair!!!!!!!!!!  It makes me angry.  It makes me broken hearted and it makes me sad!  As I sit here to type, tears are just rolling down my face and I can't stop them.

I just can't help to wonder why God has me in this situation.  I am sure it is to grow me.  I know that is the reason.  But what I don't know is why he has to grow me like this?  Last year, when we were going to host Sasha with plans to adopt him, those plans came crashing down and we felt we were told very clearly that now is not the time for us to adopt.  So, when we decided to host a child for the summer, we purposely focused on a child that could not be adopted.  That way we wouldn't be tempted to override God and do things our way.  Now, as I sit here thinking about this child that can't be adopted - it leaves me with such sorrow.  I know that I can love on her for the next 5 weeks but then what???  We can't afford to host her at Christmas and raising $2400 seems like an impossible feat considering I have tried to raise just $800 for my mission trip and I still have $625 to go and less than a month to do it in.  I feel helpless.  I want this girl to come back every year at Christmas and every year in the summer but I just know that isn't a possibility.

On a positive note, for those of you that have followed my friend's blog, they just came back two weeks ago from the Ukraine without the twin girls they left to bring home.  To make a long story short, the girls had huge reservations about being adopted because of their grandma.  Well...the very crazy thing is, Lidiya is from the same boarding school.  I showed her pictures on my friend's blog and she knew most of the kids!  And she knew Katya and Karina!!  I have learned a knew word in Russian and I will never forget...it has become my favorite word....сумасшедший.  You pronounce it sumasshedshiĭ.  In English, it means....crazy!  So, I told Lidiya, "Katya and Karina sumasshedshii."  She quickly said, "No!"  I then said, "Yes!  Katya and Karina no America...sumasshedshii!"  She then said, "Ahhh, yes!"  It was pretty funny.  She quickly wanted to stand up for her friends!

Yesterday, we went swimming and that was the most fun that Coby and Lidiya had together!!  They were able to play in the pool and just have a blast!  They didn't need to talk because you don't need words to splash each other, jump off the side, throw the ball and just swim around.  I really enjoyed watching them!

Here they jumped at the same time but I was too slow with my camera and only caught Coby in mid-air!

Here, Lidiya did a hand stand and then told Coby she wanted him to do one....

So, he did!  It was cute watching them interact!

Here is Lidiya jumping off the side.  Not sure if she tried to jump or dive but it ended up being a belly flop!

Lidiya absolutely loves Ozzie!  I gave her a journal so that she could write about her trip.  Of course, it was in Russian and cursive at that, so there is no way for me to know what she wrote.  But out of the entire thing, I did catch that she wrote Ozzie!  So, she was journaling something about him.  Adorable!  Also, she is constantly cuddling with Ozzie...he likes her too!!

Well....thanks for following my blog.  I will continue to keep it updated.  I probably won't write every day but that would bore you anyhow!  But I will keep it updated every few days or so.  Please just continue to pray for us and for Lidiya.